Life Definitions: Earthquakes

I don’t know if this is a brand new topic or just a continuation of a previous blog about Haiti’s earthquake. I was devastated to hear what happened to my country over a year ago. I was worried about not hearing from my dad, about my dying grandmother having to live through that kind of terror. But all my worries and fears faded.

And then New York gets hit with an earthquake, a tremor, if we want to be honest. Lasted the whole of five minutes and then everyone went back to work. Continue reading

Life Definitions: One Year Later

My dad and I when I was 6

And I can’t stop thinking of my dad. If he has food to eat, a place to live…if he’s okay.

I haven’t heard from him for months and while I try not to talk about it or show that it bothers me, it scares me like you wouldn’t believe.

It’s amazing how much I care for a man whose face I can’t even picture in my head. No matter what I say about him, he still makes up half of who I am. And I love him for that alone.

And on today of all days, the thought that he might not be okay hits home harder than you can imagine.

No one can even find him…I’m used to him falling off the face of the earth every once in a while, but he’s been very good about keeping in contact with me for the last six years.

I need to know that he’s okay…

Earthquake in Haiti and my dad

My dad has not been heard from, and while on a normal day, that is no cause for alarm, it would be nice to hear from him. I can’t believe that after 21 years of being in this country and having no real interest in going back to Haiti, I now wish I had made that trip before this.

My absentee father means more to me than I have let myself believe. I love him and want him to be safe and well. My brain hasn’t quite processed the fact that he might not be ok. I have gone years without hearing from him. I don’t know…

I am racked with guilt for not doing more, not caring more, not being a more attentive daughter. What if I never get a chance to speak to him again? He loves me and to qoute my mom, “after his car, we were the most important things in his life.”

At the time, I thought that was the most absurd thing I’d ever heard, after his car? But I’ll take that as long as he’s alive.