I had my wisdom teeth removed yesterday. What started out as a simple consultation appointment ended up being the last day I would spend with four of my teeth.

First, let me give you some back story on my teeth. I have never been without teeth once they started growing in. My adult teeth were already pushing out when my baby teeth started getting loose. My wisdom teeth grew out and went back in several times throughout my life. You can’t imagine the pain!

So believe me when I tell you that I’d grown attached to them. But when I found myself looking for anything sharp enough and small enough to get into the crack between my back teeth so I could push against the gum where my teeth was hurting (anything for some relief), I decided that enough was enough.

I made an appointment and went in for some x-rays. The oral surgeon said that I had perfect teeth. Yeah, that’s right, he said perfect teeth. And then asked me if I wanted to pull them today.

Instant panic mode.

Eventually I said ok and after signing a waiver saying that I wouldn’t sue if something went wrong (lovely, right?) he proceeded to stick me in my gums with the biggest damn needles I’ve ever seen. Then he went away, probably to wait for the numbness to begin. And of course, that’s when everyone wanted to talk to me, and ask me questions. My mouth felt like it was the size of a beach ball and I was starting to panic because I couldn’t swallow and these nurses wanted to ask me questions and give me instructions. Suffice it to say that I wasn’t paying any kind of attention.

After a few minutes, he came back and took a chisel and clamps and proceeded to rip my teeth out of my mouth! My mouth was numb for a few hours and bleeding. I had to get Danerys to tell the cab driver my address because I couldn’t even open my mouth. I made a quick pit stop to the pharmacy to pick up my vicodin and headed home to sleep.

Today I started listing my books on Goodreads.com and pretty much did nothing. My meds and painkillers make me pass out randomly throughout the day. I tried to eat something today and could barely eat a boiled egg. My tongue accidentally swiped the area where my lower left wisdom tooth was and it hit me: I now have HOLES in my mouth.

Sometimes, life really sucks.