The fulfillment of this goal is bittersweet to me. It makes me question why I even put on the list in the first place.

My grandmother is dead, the country is in shambles and here I go…barely able to speak fluent Creole anymore and an aversion to hot sunlight…I’m going to fit right in ::eye roll::

I wish this trip was under different circumstances, I wish I could go and have my memory of my country match the reality. But sadly that can’t happen now and I’m afraid I will be hugely disappointed.

On a different note, I might see my father. And even now I wonder whether I should send word that I will be coming…I’m told he’s a good man. But that doesn’t make me feel any more excited to see him.

We shall see.